Things You'd Never Hear Avatar Characters Say

[neytirifanboy]

Jake is facing the Thanator in the forest.

Jake: What do I do now? Run? Don't run?

Grace: Run! Definately run!

Jake: I don't believe you are right Grace. In the introductory meeting, Colonel Quaritch said and I quote; "Every living thing that crawls, flies or squats in the mud wants to kill you and eat your eyes for jujubes." However, he never said that creatures that walk or run are dangerous. And since this this thanator neither appears to crawl, fly or squat, I am going to assume it is not dangerous. Thus I shall stay right here.

[prowler]

^
nice one

[neytirifanboy]

Quaritch: You're not in Kansas anymore. Unfortunately, the air-conditioning in the Kansas room broke down. So I decided to move my opening presentation on Pandora to the Colorado room instead. That way we can all be more comfortable and relaxed. Please feel free to help yourself to some coffee, sandwiches and cookies before I start.

[Sanjwale]

^I love cookies

[MarkD]

Norm and Max are out talking when Jake stumbles into them, and not looking himself. Max: Hey Jake you ok? Jake: Aww man the Omaticaya had this sick party earlier. The last thing I remember was walking though the wood looking for Neytiri and I've been tripping balls ever since. Norm: Great to see you Jake. Listen Max and I were discussing future medicines for the Na'vi and we need your input. Jake *staring at the clouds* : Yeah very fascinating. Look can we go now? It's like the big sausage fest here. I need to find Neytiri and get it on. (based on the first Harold and Kumar movie when they first meet NPH-who is high out of his mind.)

[MarkD]

Jake at another na'vi clan member: Kalxti. *gets slapped*
Neytiri: You forgot to introduce yourself. Hello brother. *gets slapped*

Jake: WE come in peace! You.....
Neytiri: Jake, Jake.

clan leader: I am Ne'um of the mountain clan. Who are you?

Jake: Well if you are the clan leader, then who is this?

Ne'um: His name is Bent Twig. He is not right in the head.

[Hufwe'ite]

Jake: Quaritch sure is packing some heavy gear.

Trudy: Yeah, that's cause we're not the only thing fl- wait, what?

Random soldier: Aw man, that is just wrong.

[HufweMakto]

Col. Quaritch: Your not in Kansas anymore, you're on Candid Camera.

[MarkD]

Neytiri: Are you stupid or something?

Jake: Stupid is as stupid does ma'am.

[HufweMakto]

Thanator (as it starts to leap on Col. Quaritch): I want to give you a HUG!!!!